My daughter, the teenaged naturalist.

[The scene:  This morning.  In the bathroom.  I am brushing my teeth, cardiologist Claire is hanging around, chatting.]

Claire:  [spotting an ant on the floor] Mama!  An ant!  Kill it!  Kill it!

Me:  Leave the ant alone, it’s not bothering anything.

Claire:  It’s a carpenter ant!  It will eat the carpet!  Kill it!

Me:  It will not.  Leave the ant alone.

Claire:  Look, at the ant, Mama!  I see its antlers!

Me:  Those are antenae, not antlers.

Claire:  [with audible eyerolling] What-EVER.

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